This is (almost) all last minute fussinesses looking toward a final presentation. This is very nice indeed.
{quote] open nanpa wan [/quote]
We don’t have a standard system for citing texts. I suppose the usual, longwinded, version is ‘kipisi nanpa wan pi lipu Open’ , probably shortened to 'Open wan’ maybe even with colons bfore the verses.
wan
open la sewi li pali e sewi e ma.
tu
ma li pakala li jo e ala. pimeja li sinpin anpa. kon sewi li tawa lon sewi telo.
I’m not sure ‘pakala’ catches the jumbled confusion involved in “without form” but nothing else obviously comes closer. ‘pimja li lon sinpin anpa'
tu wan
sewi li toki e ni: suno o lon. suno li lon.
tu tu
sewi li lukin e ni: suno li pona. sewi li tu e suno tan pimeja.
luka
sewi li nimi e suno e pimeja. ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa wan.
luka wan
sewi li toki e ni: "selo o lon. selo ni o tu e telo”.
I don’t know what a firmament is but “skin”, or at least “boundary”, seems pretty good. ‘supa’ also has its fans
luka tu
sewi li pali e selo. ona li tu e telo pi lon anpa tan telo pi lon sewi. ni li kama.
luka tu wan
sewi li nimi e selo. ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa tu.
luka tu tu
sewi li toki e ni: "telo pi anpa o kulupu. ma pi telo ala o lon." ni li kama.
‘pi’ needs two worda after so either ‘telo anpa’ (probably best) or ‘telo pi lon anpa’ The ‘lon wan’ may be useful with ‘kulupu’, which could cover forming many puddles.
luka luka
sewi li pana e nimi "ma" tawa telo ala. sewi li pana e nimi "telo" tawa telo mute. sewi li lukin e ni: ni li pona
luka luka wan
sewi li toki e ni: ma o pana e kasi e kasi ante pi jo kiwen e kasi suli ante pi kili pi jo kiwen. ni li kama.
I confess to missing the fusy details about fruit that breed true and there being several different kinds and all, but I recognize that that is going to be messy, even if done in several sentences (as it surely would have to be).
luka luka tu
ma li pana e kasi e kasi ante pi jo kiwen e kasi suli ante pi kili pi jo kiwen. sewi li lukin e ni: ni li pona.
luka luka tu wan
ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa tu wan.
luka luka tu tu
sewi li toki e ni: suno tu o lon selo sewi. ona li toki tawa ni: "suno li tu e tenpo suno tan tenpo pimeja. suno o sitelen e tenpo sewi e tenpo suno e sike suno.”
‘sitelen’ as a verb “mark” or as a noun “sign” (which would take ‘tawa’, I suppose). This is a little obscure, as all the various meanings of ‘suno’ in this stretch. Well, you pay a price for a small vocabulary.
luka luka luka
suno ni o lon sewi suli tawa ni: ona li suno e ma. ni li kama.
luka luka luka wan
sewi li pali e suno suli tu. suno li lon tawa ni: ona li lawa e tenpo suno. mun li lon tawa ni: ona li lawa e tenpo pimeja. sewi li pali e suno ante kin.
I know it adds another confusion (for us, at least) but the lesser light (“shiny things in the night sky”) are all ‘mun’ in tp, even if we know they are suns when they are at home.
luka luka luka tu
sewi li pana e ona tawa sewi suli tawa ni: ona li suno e ma.
luka luka luka tu wan
ona li pali tawa ni: suno tu li lawa e tenpo suno e tenpo pimeja li tu e suno tan pimeja. sewi lukin e ni: ni li pona.
luka luka luka tu tu
ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa tu tu.
mute
sewi li toki e ni: "telo o pana e soweli mute. waso o lon insa pi sewi suli."
mute wan
sewi li pali e kala suli e soweli ale pi tawa insa telo e waso ante kin. sewi li lukin e ni: ni li pona.
probably ‘tawa lon insa telo’
mute tu
sewi li pana e pona tawa ona li toki e ni: "kala o kama mute lon telo. waso o kama mute lon kon."
mute tu wan
ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa luka.
mute tu tu
sewi li toki e ni: ma o pana e soweli ante e soweli wawa e akesi e soweli ma. ni li kama.
muke luka
sewi li pana e soweli ma ante e soweli wawa ante e akesi ma ale ante. sewi li lukin e ni: ni li pona.
mute luka wan
sewi li toki e ni: "mi o pali e jan. jan o sama mi. ona o lawa e kala pi telo suli e waso sewi e soweli wawa e ma ale e akesi ma ale."
mute luka tu
sewi li pali e jan. sewi li sama e jan. sewi li pali e mije e meli.
mute luka tu wan
sewi li pana e pona tawa ona. sewi li toki e ni. "ona o kama mute. ona o lon ma ale. ona o lawa e ma. ona o lawa e kala pi telo suli e waso sewi e soweli ale pi tawa pi lon ma."
mute luka tu tu
sewi li toki e ni: mi pana e kasi pi jo kiwen pi lon supa ma e kasi suli ale pi jo kili pi jo kiwen tawa sina. ni li moku sina.
mute luka luka
mi pana e moku pi kasi laso ale tawa soweli ma ale en waso sewi ale en akesi ma ale. ni li kama.
mute luka luka wan
sewi li lukin e ni ale: ni li pona mute. ni li tenpo pi suno pini. ni li tenpo pi suno sin. ni li tenpo suno nanpa luka wan.
open nanpa tu
wan
ni li nasin pini tawa sewi en ma en ale lon pi sewi anu ma.
I’m sure that ‘anu’ should be ‘en’.
tu
tenpo suno nanpa luka tu la sewi li pini e pali ona. tenpo suno nanpa luka tu la sewi li lape tan ni: ona li pini e pali ona.
‘lape’ really is too much, I think. The crucial thing (for future use, certainly) is that God doesn’t do any work on the seventh day. So just ‘pali ala’ (which fits nicely with the fact that his work is done). And so throughout this and the next verse.
tu wan
sewi li pana e pona tawa tenpo suno nanpa luka li sewi e ona tan ni: sewi li lape. sewi li lape tan ni: ona li pini e pali ale.
I’m looking forward to a final version.