Thank you both for these helpful replies. I gather that tenpo seli and tenpo lete are set, so no problem using those. I think that tenpo pi kama seli and tenpo pi kama lete are simple and brilliant ways to express the other two, right in the spirit of tp - as far as I know it. I'd use those in other contexts, but I think that for haiku, I need to try something a little less direct, 'hints' as janKipo suggests, in order to avoid using pi within the name of the season.
I've found that many
classical haiku are pretty much impossible to render in tp without loading them with so much paraphrase that they lose the lightness and brevity that are core qualities of the genre. Some other, however, come across very nicely I find, and wonderfully reflect the essence of the original. I'll start posting some of these here shortly.
One line I've had a bit of struggle with, is aki no kure
- 'evening of autumn' which, albeit simple, requires two paraphrases to be conjoined in tp. One 'solution' I've come up with for this that I like is
pi tenpo jelo
Or is that getting too obscure? What do you think? It is the last line of the haiku. Is it grammatically in order to have such an item as a last line, grammatically unconnected to the rest? In the original, it just works as an isolated noun phrase that states, obviously, that it is an autumn evening.
The whole thing goes
kare eda ni
karasu no tomarikeri
aki no kure
on a withered branch
a crow has settled
janKipo wrote:[Actually looking at the old lists gives ‘tenpo pi lete lili’ for “fall” and the corresponding thing for “spring”, but also just ‘tenpo laso’ and the ‘kama’ version above.
What are the old lists? Is this available online?
ala li sin lon anpa suno. jan ala li ken toki e ni: 'o lukin! ni li sin a!' tan ni: ale li kama li tawa weka lon tenpo pini.- Eccl. 1.10