kulupu lipu Pipija. lipu nanpa wan pi jan Mose

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jan Ote
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kulupu lipu Pipija. lipu nanpa wan pi jan Mose

Postby jan Ote » Fri Jan 29, 2010 4:11 pm

John E Clifford, Mon Sep 04, 2006 11:26 am wrote:There are at least two other trats back in the archives, one going on for a while, and several Babels. We need -- in the course of setting up our corpus -- to do a King James "all previous translation compared and revised." or however it goes.
I've found four translations of the first verses of the Bible. The fifth is mine.

toki nanpa wan pi lipu nimi "open"

New Revised Standard Version
  1. In the beginning when God created [1] the heavens and the earth,
  2. the earth was a formless void and darkness covered the face of the deep, while a wind from God [2] swept over the face of the waters.
  3. Then God said, "Let there be light"; and there was light.
  4. And God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from the darkness.
  5. God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And there was evening and there was morning, the first day.
[1] Or "when God began to create" or "In the beginning God created"
[2] Or "while the spirit of God" or "while a mighty wind"

jan Kowi, 2004-08-27 (?)
http://www.tokipona.bravehost.com/genesis1.html
  1. tenpo pi nanpa wan la ma ali li jo e ijo ala.
  2. pimeja mute li lon. taso jan sewi li lon li wile pali.
  3. ona li toki e ni: suno o li lon! tenpo ala la suno li suno lon ma ali.
  4. --
  5. jan sewi li nimi e ni tawa suno: tenpo suno. ona li nimi kin e ni tawa pimeja: tenpo pimeja.
jan Sami, 2006-01-19
http://forums.tokipona.org/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=477
  1. tenpo wan la jan sewi Jawe li pali e sewi laso en ma suli.
  2. taso, ma suli li jo e ala. ale li pimeja. jan kon pi jan sewi Jawe li sewi pi telo suli.
  3. jan sewi Jawe li toki e: "o suno li wile". suno li kama.
  4. jan sewi Jawe li lukin e suno li pilin: suno li pona. jan sewi Jawe li pana e suno sama ala pi kon pimeja.
  5. jan sewi Jawe li pana e nimi pi suno: tenpo suno. jan sewi Jawe li pana e nimi pi kon pimeja: tenpo pimeja. tenpo ni li tenpo suno nanpa wan.
jan Oli, 2006-09-04
http://forums.tokipona.org/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=546#p1814
  1. tenpo pini mute mute la jan sewi li pali e sewi e ma.
  2. ma li pakala li pimeja. kon pi jan sewi li tawa lon sewi telo.
  3. jan sewi li toki e ni: suno o lon (or: mi wile e suno). suno li lon.
  4. jan sewi li lukin e suno. suno li pona. jan sewi li tu e suno tan pimeja.
  5. jan sewi li pana e nimi "suno" tawa suno e nimi "pimeja" tawa pimeja. pimeja en suno li tenpo suno pi nanpa wan.
jan Kipo, 2006-09-12
http://forums.tokipona.org/viewtopic.php?f=33&t=561
  1. tenpo nanpa wan la jan sewi li open lon e sewi en ma
  2. la ma li pakala. ali li pimeja. kon pi jan sewi li tawa lon sewi telo.
  3. jan sewi li toki e ni. o suno li lon. suno li lon.
  4. jan sewi lukin e ni: suno li pona. jan sewi li tu e suno tan pimeja.
  5. jan sewi li nimi "tenpo suno" e suno li nimi "tenpo pimeja" e pimeja. pini suno li kama. open suno li kama. tu ni li kama e suno nanpa wan.
jan Ote, 2010-01-29
  1. tenpo open la jan sewi li pali e sewi e ma.
  2. ma li jo e ala li pakala. ali li pimeja. kon pi jan sewi li lon sewi telo.
  3. jan sewi li toki e ni: "suno o lon". suno li kama lon.
  4. jan sewi li lukin e suno li pilin e ni: suno li pona. jan sewi li tu e suno tan pimeja.
  5. jan sewi li nimi pi "tenpo suno" e suno li nimi pi "tenpo pimeja" e pimeja. pini suno li kama. open suno li kama. tu ni li kama e suno pi nanpa wan.
Notes:
2. Veha'arets hayetah tohu vavohu vechoshech al-peney tehom veruach Elohim merachefet al-peney hamayim.
"Tohu-va-bohu" is usually translated as "formless and empty", but "bohu" doesn't seem to have any own meaning, so it's likely it has been used for aliteration effect. (There is another one aliteration: "tohu va bohu" and "tahom" (a deep)). So I tried to preserve both: traditional emptyness and chaos and aliteration: 'ma li jo e ala li pakala'.
___________
EDIT 2010-02-03: Corey's (jan Kowi) translation added

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