Dave's writing exercise - figure skating

[aikidave]

tenpo pini lili la, kulupu mama mi li tawa ma tomo (Colorado Springs) kepeken tomo tawa kon. meli lili mi li tawa lon telo lete kepeken ilo tu. meli lili li utala poka meli lili ante. utala li nimi 'musi pi ma lili pi ma Mewika'. meli mi li pali lukin pona. meli lili mi li kama jo e ijo pi kiwen jelo. meli mi li kama jo e awen pi nanpa wan. mi mute li tawa e tomo sona pi tomo tawa kon pi ma Mewika. mi mute li tawa e tomo sona pi musi ma Mewika. ma tomo li sewi. mi mute li tawa e kon pona ala. mi mute li moku e telo mute. mi mute li pana e mani kepeken tomo tawa.

All comments / corrections to my text are welcome. I am still trying to learn TP.
Thanks,
Dave

A little while ago, my family flew to Colorado Springs. My daughter is a figure skater (she moves on ice using sharp tools). She competes with other little girls. The competition is called the State Games of America. She skated beautifully. She won a gold medal. She came in first place. We visited the USAF academy. We visited the US Olympic Training Center. The city is at a high elevation. It is difficult to breathe. We must drink lots of water because of elevation. We rented a car.

[rdmiller3]

[jan-ante]

[aikidave]

o pona tawa nimi pona sina. mi kama sona e toki pona. tenpo kama la, mi wile sitelen e lipu mute mi lon toki pona. mi lukin e pini pi toki pona. mi wile sitelen ni: ijo lili kama e tenpo suno ni.

Thank you for your helpful comments. In the future, after I become more proficient in TP, I want to write my journal/blog in TP. I am looking for (or trying to push) the limits of TP. I wish to write about the little things that happen each day.
What airline I took is not important, but the way I get to my destination is important (drove, flew, walked). The type of sites I visit and what I felt about them, are important, but not the specific names of the attractions.
I think exploring the limits of TP will help flesh out the language and identify areas and questions for Sonja to decide / rule on.

[rdmiller3]

tenpo mute la, jan pi kama sona toki li toki e ni: o ante e toki ni.
taso ni li pakala e toki pona.
o ike ala e toki pona.
o pona e pilin sina.
o kama sona e toki pona poka sin ala.

Ŝajnas ke ĉiu komencanto volas kompliki tokiponon anstataŭ simpligi sin mem.

It seems like so many beginners want to complicate Toki Pona instead of to simplify themselves.

[jan-ante]