janTepanNetaPelin wrote:You don't need "ijo" in "(ijo) ala". So "ala li pana e sona" (with "e").
"ijo nasa li lon ma ali" with "li"
You don't need "jan" in "(jan) meli" or "(jan) mije".
I don't understand the sentence where Ms. Taseli is talking about the neighbor. :/ (Are Tateli and Taseli two different families?)
"ona ala li lukin e ni": The position of "ala" suggests, that "not they" (but someone else) saw it. Probably better: "ona li lukin ala e ni".
You apparently used "waso" in order to say "to fly". I like the idea.
Typo (I suppose): kama jo e *poki -> poka
"uta e kon" (with "e")
I don't understand "weka e pana lon sinpin". :/
"admirably-bad" might be "ike pona", in which case an "admirably-bad child" would be a "jan lili pi ike pona". (A "little person of good evil", if you will.)
I'd prefer "li lon insa" (with "lon") over "li insa", which sounds like "is the innards" to me.
I hope this helps.
janChowlett wrote:I believe I did accidentally just miss the "e", but on review I think it could maybe go either way? "to give, and that being given is knowledge"; or "to knowledge-give". Not sure, though.
The original sentence is "Mrs Dursley gossiped away happily as she wrestled a screaming Dudley into his high chair", which I've attempted to render as "Mrs Dursley talked about news of their neighbours and fought very noisy Dudley at the high chair".
Does it? I didn't know that. Any reference for that - I'm not as widely read as I should be? The original here is "None of them noticed..."
That's probably partially because I have a typo - it should be "pan". "throwing his cereal at the walls"
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