Dave''s writing exercises #3

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daraffa

Dave''s writing exercises #3

Postby daraffa » Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:58 am


tenpo ni la jan li pilin ike lon ma Mewika. mute mani  li lili.  jan mute li jo
ala e pali awen. ken sona wan li ni: jan li jo ala e mani. jan mute li wile jo e
tomo. kulupu lawa li toko ni: tomo mani li wile pana e mani tawa jan. jan li
pana e mani tawa tomo. taso jan li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo. tomo mani li
kama jo e tomo jan. tomo mani li pini pana e mani. tomo mani ali ala li open
ala. pona pi lipu esun li anpa. lawa esun ali ala li pana e mani mute. ni li
pona ala tawa mi.

jan li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo tawa. esun pi tomo tawa li open ala.
kulupu lawa li kama jo e tomo mani e esun pi tomo tawa. ni li ala nasin pi ma
Mewika.

All comments on my text are welcome.
Thanks,
Dave

Now people are scared in America. There is little money. Many people do not have
jobs. One cause is this: people do not have money. Many people wished to own
houses. The government told banks to loan them money. The people bought houses.
But the people could not pay for the houses. The banks took the people's houses.
The banks stopped lending money. Some banks closed. Stocks fell. (value of
buisness paper fell) Some business leaders make much money. This is not good.

People cannot buy cars. The car companies are going out of business. The
government is taking banks and car companies. This is not the American way.


John E Clifford

Re: Dave''s writing exercises #3

Postby John E Clifford » Wed Jul 15, 2009 12:51 pm


very nice, as usual.




________________________________
From: daraffa <aikidave@gmail.com>
To: tokipona@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 8:58:00 AM
Subject: [tokipona] Dave's writing exercises #3





tenpo ni la jan li pilin ike lon ma Mewika. mute mani li lili.
or 'mani lili li lon' or 'mani li lon lili' or some such.

jan mute li jo ala e pali awen. ken sona wan li ni: jan li jo ala e mani.
or 'ken la tan ni wan li ni:' or some such. I tend to think of 'sona' as
'reason' which someone gives for doing something rather than a cause, but that
is probably just me.

jan mute li wile jo e tomo. kulupu lawa li toko ni:

toki

tomo mani li wile pana e mani tawa jan. jan li pana e mani tawa tomo. taso jan
li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo.
the contrast here is hard to do in tp. So far, it just looks like a
contradiction, not a conflict. Maybe 'wile pana' v. 'ken pana' or 'pana' v.
'ken pi awen pana'

tomo mani li kama jo e tomo jan. tomo mani li pini pana e mani. tomo mani ali
ala li open ala.

'Not all bank don't open' amounts to 'At least some banks open' 'Some' is sorta
the default for bare words (except as context provides, of course) so, strictly,
'tomo mani li open ala' is OK. but it may be read as 'The banks don't open,'
suggesting that all or most of them don't. Just 'tomo mani pi ali ala li
open' works but is really dubious , though the (equivalent?) without the 'pi'
looks OK.
pona pi lipu esun li anpa. lawa esun ali ala li pana e mani mute.
'lawa esun [some] li kama jo e mani mute' Now, 'lawa esun ali ala li kama ala
jo e mani mute' works, but is way too complex. I would be content with just
'lawa esun li kama jo e mani mute' and let the accusation fly. But then, I am a
Christian Socialist.

ni li pona ala tawa mi.

jan li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo tawa. esun pi tomo tawa li open ala.
kulupu lawa li kama jo e tomo mani e esun pi tomo tawa. ni li ala nasin pi ma
Mewika.
jan sonja promises that 'esun' is going to verb out as 'buy' and/or 'sell' but I
don't know how that is going to work out yet.



All comments on my text are welcome.
Thanks,
Dave

Now people are scared in America. There is little money. Many people do not have
jobs. One cause is this: people do not have money. Many people wished to own
houses. The government told banks to loan them money. The people bought houses.
But the people could not pay for the houses. The banks took the people's houses.
The banks stopped lending money. Some banks closed. Stocks fell. (value of
buisness paper fell) Some business leaders make much money. This is not good.

People cannot buy cars. The car companies are going out of business. The
government is taking banks and car companies. This is not the American way.







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]


John E Clifford

Re: Dave''s writing exercises #3

Postby John E Clifford » Wed Jul 15, 2009 4:06 pm


Last sentence should probably be 'ni li nasin ala ...'




________________________________
From: John E Clifford <kali9putra@yahoo.com>
To: tokipona@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 11:51:11 AM
Subject: Re: [tokipona] Dave's writing exercises #3





very nice, as usual.

____________ _________ _________ __
From: daraffa <aikidave@gmail. com>
To: tokipona@yahoogroup s.com
Sent: Wednesday, July 15, 2009 8:58:00 AM
Subject: [tokipona] Dave's writing exercises #3

tenpo ni la jan li pilin ike lon ma Mewika. mute mani li lili.
or 'mani lili li lon' or 'mani li lon lili' or some such.

jan mute li jo ala e pali awen. ken sona wan li ni: jan li jo ala e mani.
or 'ken la tan ni wan li ni:' or some such. I tend to think of 'sona' as
'reason' which someone gives for doing something rather than a cause, but that
is probably just me.

jan mute li wile jo e tomo. kulupu lawa li toko ni:

toki

tomo mani li wile pana e mani tawa jan. jan li pana e mani tawa tomo. taso jan
li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo.
the contrast here is hard to do in tp. So far, it just looks like a
contradiction, not a conflict. Maybe 'wile pana' v. 'ken pana' or 'pana' v.
'ken pi awen pana'

tomo mani li kama jo e tomo jan. tomo mani li pini pana e mani. tomo mani ali
ala li open ala.

'Not all bank don't open' amounts to 'At least some banks open' 'Some' is sorta
the default for bare words (except as context provides, of course) so, strictly,
'tomo mani li open ala' is OK. but it may be read as 'The banks don't open,'
suggesting that all or most of them don't. Just 'tomo mani pi ali ala li
open' works but is really dubious , though the (equivalent? ) without the 'pi'
looks OK.
pona pi lipu esun li anpa. lawa esun ali ala li pana e mani mute.
'lawa esun [some] li kama jo e mani mute' Now, 'lawa esun ali ala li kama ala
jo e mani mute' works, but is way too complex. I would be content with just
'lawa esun li kama jo e mani mute' and let the accusation fly. But then, I am a
Christian Socialist.

ni li pona ala tawa mi.

jan li ken ala pana e mani tawa tomo tawa. esun pi tomo tawa li open ala.
kulupu lawa li kama jo e tomo mani e esun pi tomo tawa. ni li ala nasin pi ma
Mewika.
jan sonja promises that 'esun' is going to verb out as 'buy' and/or 'sell' but I
don't know how that is going to work out yet.

All comments on my text are welcome.
Thanks,
Dave

Now people are scared in America. There is little money. Many people do not have
jobs. One cause is this: people do not have money. Many people wished to own
houses. The government told banks to loan them money. The people bought houses.
But the people could not pay for the houses. The banks took the people's houses.
The banks stopped lending money. Some banks closed. Stocks fell. (value of
buisness paper fell) Some business leaders make much money. This is not good.

People cannot buy cars. The car companies are going out of business. The
government is taking banks and car companies. This is not the American way.

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]







[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]



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