mi ante e toki sitelen pi mi

Creativity: Poetry, music, comics, etc.
Kreado: Poezio, muziko, bildrakontoj, ktp.
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jan Lopata
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Feb 26, 2020 4:42 am

mi ante e toki sitelen pi mi

Post by jan Lopata »

toki!

mi sitelen e toki kepeken toki Inli. tenpo ni la mi sitelen e toki lili tu tu. tenpo kama la mi wile sitelen pini li pana e lipu. ona li pali pi tenpo mute tawa mi!

I am writing a story in English. So far I have written four chapters. In future I aim to finish and (hopefully) publish it as a book. This will take me a long time!

mi ante tawa toki pona e ijo lili pi ona. mi wile sona e ni: sina sona ala sona e ante mi? mi pilin e ni: sina sona ala e ante. ante e ni li ike tan ona li jo mute e kulupu nimi ike

I have translated (or attempted to) a small sample into toki pona. I would like to know whether you understand my translation. I expect that it won't make sense. Translating it was difficult because it has many compound sentences:

==
ma Kiwen-kuli-telo

jan Kapin li pana anpa e poki monsi ona li weka noka e ni tawa selo pi tomo lawa pi linja seli li nimi e ‘B16’.

ona li tomo sama linja pi selo nasa. ona li jo lupa lukin ala. ona li wan pi tomo pakala li poka ali lon sike e sike poki pi ijo lili mute pi tomo sike seli suli mute pi ma Pitan li nimi ‘Seli Kiwen-kuli-telo’.

sama e linja seli ante pi tomo ni la linja ‘B16’ li pali e kulupu linja pi tomo pali en tomo sona en tomo lili li poka selo e linja ante tu li ali li lon linja sike ante pi tomo sike.
==

jan pana e ante tawa toki Inli la mi pana e sitelen wan tawa lukin sama ala sama.

When people have posted their readings in English, I'll post the original for comparison.

PS: How did I do translating the surrounding explanation.

mi tawa!
janKipo
Posts: 3064
Joined: Fri Oct 09, 2009 2:20 pm

Re: mi ante e toki sitelen pi mi

Post by janKipo »

prob ‘’pini sitelen’ “finish writing’ rather than ‘stelen pini’ “write completely’. more like ‘ni’, the whole event, than ‘ona’ some little part of it
prepositional phrases go after direct object (‘e’) so ‘e ijo lili ... tawa toki pona’.
the dash hasn’t beeen define for tp cpmpounds so this is just unclear "Wet (or clear) collored stones” (or maybe differently grouped).
“Kapin put down hsi backback and discarded this (what?) footally(?) for the shelter of the main house of the hot line and (he) named B16 (the quotes seem out of place, B16 is what gets named not the name it gets).
It is the strangel ybarked linearly same house. [surely ‘jo ala e lupa lukin’ ]. “It has no windowa”. “It is one od the ruinsd housses and is ....
I give up! there are a string of words that g=cannot goe together as preented and come to an eventual sentence.
It does not even read like an pverliteral translation of English (to me).
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