Minor questions: 'moll' or 'Kama moli'? Dead or dies? What does 'ona' in line 8 refer to (apparently akesi). 'pana moku' "emit foodily"? "all circular time" ? Maybe 'tenpo Ali li sike'? I suppose you mean 'ona li lukin e ni Ali sama pona'.
dies. kama moli
does refer to the akesi
. pana moku
is intended to be "gives food". Of course, it's moku
that is the direct object, not kasi
. *goes and looks up indirect objects*tenpo sike ali
means "circular time is complete/whole".ona li lukin e ni ali pona
is "he/she sees that all this is good." ni Ali sama pona
would be better here?
edit: can't find anything on indirect objects. How do we do that, a preposition?